too far gone

"The mere fact that you realize you need help, indicates you are not too far gone."

I heard this quote, spoken by Lucy from 'A Charlie Brown Christmas' the other day while making dinner in the kitchen.  And it got me thinking.  Where am I on the "too far gone" scale?  Every time I think of this, it just humors me!  One, because it's adorable hearing that sentence come out of a child's mouth and two, because, I really, honestly, truly believe, that I AM infact, somewhere on that scale... and progressing deeper into it.  Hey, at least I can laugh about it.  And I must not yet be "TOO FAR GONE" if I know I'm even there. 

Although, that realization feels like watching the back end of a tunnel light as I ride a train farther and farther away from it... getting smaller and smaller...  soon, I fear, I might not realize it anymore.

That's okay, I think it could be fun, being a little crazy...

After all, some of the most amazing, famous, and beneficial people in history were a little crazy.  Which leads me to think, maybe it's all the normal people that are really the crazy ones. 

Yeah, I think that's what I think.

Normal people are insane.

Bye bye, Baby

I feel so weird today!  Giddy, but completely unmotivated.  Maybe it's because I have an awesome weekend coming up, and my Moose'hair is coming today!  Yay!  I have so much to do!  I think it's so much that I'm just overwhelmed and don't know how to start...  I'm in trouble.

I can't believe my youngest, and last little babe, is gonna be FIVE YEARS OLD in a few days!  It's so cliche, but seriously, how did that happen?  It's like that saying in the song, 'Sunrise, Sunset' "I don't remember growing older, when did they?"  That's how I feel, I look in the mirror, and there are a few wrinkles there that weren't there a few years ago, but other than that, time REALLY flew by.

All right, well enough nonsense....  I have got to get my butt in gear.  Here we go.

pleasant surprise

There are three floors in one of the buildings I work at every night. I keep my purse and my coat on a shelf in the closet on 1st floor and spend most of my time working on 2nd floor. Well, after being upstairs for about two and a half hours, I came downstairs to get something from my purse. When I got there, someone had left me a very thoughtful gift. It made me smile the rest of the night... and will no doubt keep me in a good mood at work, all winter long! (I know it was you Terri!) Here's what she left me, taped to the wall...

He should have won AGAIN this year, I'm sorry, but Ryan Reynolds? He can't even stand in the same category, no one can, Johnny is in a class of his own. The class of untouchable gorgeousness... and yes, I'm aware of how obsessed I sound.

The heart of a photograph

This last weekend I went through all the archives of my photos, with the intention of organizing them, we're talking thousands of photos. Yeah, a little overwhelming to say the least... this might take like, oh I don't know, a few months or so. Anyway, that's besides the point. In looking through them, I just wanted to be able to jump into some of the photos, and just vacation there... all winter :)

This is why I love photography! Your mind can hold a memory, but over time the true image of it gets manipulated and warped. But thanks to the best invention ever, the camera of course, I can look at a stand still moment of time ... every blade of grass, every freckle on a face and every cloud in the sky of the days I never want to forget.

These are some of my favorite days.

The never ending circular ride.

Does it make me a "grinch" to think that Christmas, along with all these other ridiculous holidays that completely misrepresent the true meaning behind them are just numbing the societies that practice them into zombie like humans?

Every year we go through the same thing.... like robotic clock work. January, new years, February, valentines day, March, st. patties, April, Easter, and so on and so on, all the way til it starts all over again the next January. I think it makes time go by a million miles per second. We're always getting ready for the next thing... it's so sickly repetitive.

Why do people need a crutch like Christmas as a reason to get together with their families or to be kind to humanity because it's "Christmas" "Tis the season" Why don't we just be honest and say, "In order to make myself feel like a decent humane being, I'm going to do something nice for this poor family in honor of the Christmas season, but I could really care less about the poverty you're in any other time of the year!" Is there something difficult about caring for others, and having the urge to spend time with family any other time of the year? Wouldn't the randomness of doing generous and loving acts any time throughout the year be more meaningful and exciting? I mean really think about it, what kind of message are we giving to our children? "oh it's Christmas time again! Time to think about baby Jesus and be nice to people." What? Is there something preventing us from doing that every day all year round? We seriously need a time of year for that?

Twenty seven years of the same thing over and over and over again.... I feel like I need to wake up from this coma! And each year goes by faster and faster and faster! I can't imagine how quickly my 50th year will go by, at this rate it will probably seem like two weeks.

I know all these stupid holidays are super fun for the kids and all, I won't deny, I loved them as a kid. I just can't help but have a sense of guilt, taking part in it when it has become so commercialized. Christmas=Santa (You better not shout you better not cry, you better not pout because Santa Claus is comin and he KNOWS who's been naughty or nice!!) Easter= A gigantic, pink, scary ass rabit. Enough said. St. Patricks= a green creepy little leprechaun looking for his gold. Valentines Day= The day out of the year to show your spouse that you love them? Oh yes, and to spend extra money in the store, for no apparent reason. Independance Day... now there is a holiday that I honestly love and respect, it will soon lose it's meaning with the way our socialist president is running things though, so soon that will just be added to the list as a day to spend hundreds on fireworks. Holloween= do I even need to say anything here? Let's just bow down to Satan, okay? Thanksgiving= Why can't we be thankful everyday? Why do we need to stuff our mouths to the point of feeling like we have to throw
up when our neighbors at the very same moment are curled in the fetal position in bed because their stomachs hurt so bad of hunger? And possibly one of the most nausiating of all, Black Friday... the mentality of these people is horrific.

God Bless America, and forgive us of all the ignorant and selfish customs we partake in.